Breakups happen for many reasons. And as frustrating as it can be, we aren’t always given the closure we need.
Sometimes, we need to find it for ourselves so we can pick up our heart, dust it off, and move on to brighter times ahead.
If you find yourself in need of some answers, we’ve unpacked the 4 most common reasons for why do relationships end. If you see yourself in these 4 reasons, you’re not alone—and best of all, you can learn from them all.
4 Reasons Our Relationships Fail (and how knowing these can help you post-breakup)
1. There’s no communication.
There are more books and articles on this aspect of a relationship than any other—and yet sometimes, we still don’t get it right.
Lack of communication can stem from a lot of places: we don’t want to hurt our partner, we don’t want to start a fight, we don’t realize certain things need to be said. And sometimes, sadly, we just don’t care enough to communicate our needs.
If a relationship is to thrive, we need to keep the lines of communication open.
Experts agree that if we can communicate openly and honestly with our partner on small matters, we are more likely to feel comfortable talking about the deal breakers—the big stuff that can make or break us.
Post-breakup Tip: Be mindful of your communication with friends. Keep in touch, and reap the benefits of a more open, strong connection with your support system.
2. Money issues in the relationship.
Financial issues are one of the leading reasons for divorce in the U.S. The explanation behind this could be that money worries tap into human beings’ deepest psychological fears: threat to survival, loss of safety, lack of control, and loss of power.
This is a heady mix of fears to drag into your relationship.
Post-breakup Tip: If money is a sore point for you, take this time to grow your financial literacy or speak to an expert.
3. Drifting apart.
Maybe one partner is experiencing success at work or in other areas of life, while the other stagnates. As the couple’s social and professional lives take separate paths, their own paths diverge to follow.
This also happens when both partners live an unhealthy lifestyle, and one attempts to change. If both partners are very overweight and one loses a significant amount of weight, the new dynamic and change in lifestyle can put immense pressure on the relationship.
Post-breakup Tip: Practice being sensitive to those around you. It can be easy to lose sight of others as we strive to improve our own lives, but empathy is an excellent soft skill to help us build strong relationships.
4. The trust is broken.
Trust takes years to build and seconds to shatter. Being lied to, cheated on, manipulated, or betrayed can damage our relationships terribly. That distrust bleeds into every aspect of our relationship.
Post-breakup Tip: If you were betrayed, find ways to work through any lingering issues before you allow them to damage other relationships.
If you see your past relationships in any of these reasons, don’t be disheartened. Understanding ourselves is the first step in building a better relationship in the future—both with ourselves, and with the people around us.Ready to learn more about healing post-breakup? Click here, and let’s talk.